I just had a conversation with my lifelong best friend in which we both shared the same sentiment: being an adult is overwhelming, sometimes disappointing, and a heavy weight on our shoulders.
Friend: Sure do miss our sleepovers. Your Dad’s house. Bottom bunk. Dead AIM – both signed in.
Me: Life was easy then.
But we forget what mattered at the time. I think all parts of life pose challenges that feel insurmountable at the time. Building that shadowbox in fourth grade, your first boy-girl party in 7th grade, the ACT/SAT in high school, breaking up with your first love, college exams, etc. Sure, the problems get bigger as you get older and often you’re responsible for other people instead of just yourself.
Sometimes I look around and think, “I need an adult. I cannot deal with this situation alone.” But it’s just me. No one else there to cover me.
Although it doesn’t feel like it, it’s natural and normal to feel this way. I think we all feel like we’re failing because, inside, we truly feel like a kid that isn’t capable of dealing with all the things we need to. But trust me, you’re most likely doing better than you think and you are conquering so many adult things daily.
Your kid spread coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor? You get creative with cleanup. Your dog destroys the couch? You find a way to buy a new one and not let it happen again. You lost someone you love? You find a way to persevere and let yourself love again.
Yeah, we may need a minute to let ourselves wallow in sorrow and panic. But we always adjust – and we always will. And once we do, the pain, frustration, disappointment eventually dissolves because we’re made to remember the past in a certain way – far less traumatic that it felt in that fresh-wound moment. Maybe even positive.
You’ll get through it. You’ll adjust.